I’ve been writing this blog for almost a year now, and in all the time there has been one major hot topic subject I’ve never broached. In fact, I’ve tip toed around it, and specifically avoided it. Even in seminary, I really soft peddled it. Not because I don’t have strong opinions or a testimony of the topic, but because my testimony leaves me in opposition of popular culture on the topic. It’s not just the generalities that scare me, it’s that people I know and love, friends, family members, people I respect. I don’t want to offend. I don’t want to have to explain things I don’t have the words to explain. I just want people to like me. I’ve seen people who state opinions similar to mine be slaughtered, not physically, but emotionally, and that scares me.
The bottom line, is the fact that I’ve been scared to state my opinion is the part of all this that scares me the most.
I’ve spent the last week watching a documentary on the history of the United States of America. I’ve spent the last few days in Washington D.C. seeing pieces of our history. In fact, I was on The Mall in DC when the Supreme Court ruled on this topic. It seems so un-American to be scared to state what I believe, and it gives me empathy for those with the opposing view who were scared to state their opinion for so very long.
What is my opinion that I’m scared to state? Actually, it’s more than just a mere opinion, it’s a testimony.
I believe that marriage is ordained of God and is between a man and a woman.
Was that so scary? Yes. Why? I don’t really know, but I do know that I’m not the only one who feels nervous about testifying of our unpopular view.
The biggest reason it is hard to state my opinion is that I don’t have the words to express why. Every reason I could state has already been stated, and been blasted. It’s not good enough for those who don’t feel the same way. This does not mean my testimony does not have a foundation, just that the foundation my testimony is built upon is not recognized as valid.
At the end of the Book of Mormon, Moroni is left wandering around alone because the Lamanites, “because of their hatred they put to death every Nephite that will not deny the Christ.” (Moroni 1:2) Those who have a different view than I am are not killing those who believe as I do, but emotional, and sometimes physical, persecution is real.
Moroni wandered because, in his own words “And I, Moroni, will not deny the Christ.” (Moroni 1:3) He had an unpopular testimony, and it meant he was alone for the rest of his life.
His example gives me strength. Stating my opinion on gay marriage will not result in consequences so extreme, for which I am truly grateful. So although it is unpopular, although people may blast me with words, although this may be the scariest post I’ve ever written, I can no longer deny my testimony without risking my spiritual growth being inhibited.
I, Amy, will not deny that marriage is ordained of God, and is between a man and a woman.
NOTE: Original post stated “one man and one woman” – I have edited it to more closely match the wording of “The Family: A Proclamation to the World”